Why Pro-Life Parents Should Focus on the Positives

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Remember what it’s like being pregnant for the first time? There’s the excitement, the nervousness, and all the newness! There is a lot to be joyful about, and there’s a whole lot more to look forward to. But then you come across some Debbie Downers along the way who just want to tell you about all the terrible things their children do and to make sure you stay pregnant as long as possible because once that baby pops out, your life will be a disaster.

Now was that necessary, Deb? Did ya have to go and rain on that sweet new mommy’s parade? She most likely already had to watch the “purple crying” video in her prenatal course along with the real life labor videos… and then was probably also shown forceps (those things ain’t for the faint of heart) and now you’re gonna go and terrify her with the thought of having imperfect children?! No no no no no! Just stop. Please, just stop while you’re ahead.

If you’re a pro-life mother, I’m not saying you have to be happy-go-lucky all the dang time (I admit it is difficult to do with children), but have you thought of the impression you are giving people when you speak badly about your children to anyone that has ears, most especially a woman who is expecting her first? Pro life means you promote life. That means you should be encouraging pregnant mothers. It means you should be thankful that they are willing to embrace the sacrifices ahead by giving life to another. You should be rejoicing with that mother and praising God. You should not be telling her, however,  that you wish you could go back to the days before you had kids because you had no idea then how incredibly difficult it would be and how much hair you would lose and how your body will never be the same and blah blah blah. This woman is already a mother. And guess what? With the laws in most states, she could still decide to end that precious baby’s life. Do you want to be a reason for that? Christians are called to share the Good News.

So I beg you fellow mamas to focus on the positives. That new mom you met at Walmart has already seen a few to get her to where she’s at now: the positive pregnancy test, the positive decision to continue carrying her child, the positive belief that she can handle what is in her future. Keep her going strong. Tell her how amazing it is to hold your baby in your arms for the first time and how calming it is to watch her sleep. Tell her how proud it made you to hear the word “mama” chiming so sweetly from her lips. Let her know how great the laughter and love in your life has grown since you became a mother, how you truly can’t explain the way that your heart continues to burst with every day that passes, how you understand God’s paternal love in a more profound way that would be utterly impossible without the blessing of your own children. Congratulate her on the life ahead. Congratulate yourself. You could have just saved a life.

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Decisions, Decisions

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The parenting gig is overflowing with choices. Should one of us stay home with the tiny humans or should we send them to daycare? Should we use positive parenting techniques or should we smack their booties like the so-called “tried and true” method our parents’ used? Should we feed them all organic or… is that a wood chip in her mouth?!

See what I mean?? I could literally drown myself in all the articles I’ve read on this crap! But after 3 entire years of parenting as of yesterday (*tears welling up as I try to recall what she was like as a baby), I’ve come to learn, and don’t laugh at me veteran moms, that each decision we make as parents has to come primarily from our own hearts with a good heap of Wisdom.

Tonight my decision was to work out or to resume sitting in our big comfy chair and allow my 9 month old (*pause while I reminisce on her newborn picture for a moment too) to sleep soundly against my chest. Work out or listen to the sweet sound of baby breaths? Put myself through physical pain or soak up pure joy and peace from the warmth of that precious dreaming face? I mean really, dude, have you ever held a sleeping little one? There is absolutely no better feeling than letting your child sleep in your lap. It’s my heaven. It’s relaxing. It’s stress-relieving. It’s bliss. But alas, most days I have to lay the child down and spend some time with Daniel and Kelli. Yes, daily workouts are a great habit to keep but sometimes you just gotta push things aside and listen to that call of motherhood. And I was so grateful that I did! I cherished every bit of that time with my girl, knowing that it’s a tremendous privilege to hold a baby in my arms as she sleeps. And this brings me to my point…

Parenting is a privilege just as the choices we make each day are privileges. These are gifts from God, our Father. They are opportunities to love and to grow in virtue. God lays every.single.decision before us each day and affords us the option to follow His direction or to see what we come up with on our own. Haven’t you noticed how much better things turn out when we open up the door and let God in? The best days are always the days that I thought about God the most, that I depended on the Holy Spirit for guidance, that I stopped and thanked the Lord for the sweet moments. Our challenge as mamas and dadas is to constantly offer thanksgiving for these everyday choices we make whether they be difficult, life-changing ones or easy yes’s and no’s. Be thankful that God gave us freedom. Be thankful that God offers His help. Be thankful that God is willing to let us take care of His children.

Peace, love, and a big, warm hug,

Olivia